I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
I wear drunk well.
I have post one night stand depression
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