I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
