idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Randomize
