one two three fourrrrnication!
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
