I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize
