That's intense
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Randomize
