Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
