It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
