He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
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