So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
our cab driver is having phone sex.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Randomize
