We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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