wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Randomize
