Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Randomize
