Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
I'm sobbing to NWA
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
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