There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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