That's when you crack a 10am beer
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Randomize
