I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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