Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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