He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
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