is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.�
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
