Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Randomize
