I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
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