Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
