Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Randomize
