Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
you traded sex for a burrito?
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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