I think I died a long time ago.
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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