Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
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