I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Randomize
