you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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