Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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