I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
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