yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
COCAINE IS GR8
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Randomize
