next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
smell my finger.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
