Fine. I'll sleep in my office
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
