Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Randomize
