Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Randomize
