He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
Randomize
