I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
