Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Randomize
