Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
Randomize
