That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
