marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
We need to rekindle our bromance
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
I need moral support for this bender
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Randomize
