I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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