Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize
