on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
Randomize