You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Randomize
