Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
