On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
I understand Curling. That high.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
