no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
Randomize
