Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
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